I was somewhere in Westchester yesterday when I wound up getting lost. Getting lost in a tractor trailer is a unique experience because it’s usually difficult to pull into a gas station and ask for directions. This is why you’ll usually see truck drivers making drastic maneuvers like leaving the truck in the turning lane with the four ways flashing while we go in search of valuable information.

I happened to see another trucker sitting on the side of the shoulder, so I figured this’d be the perfect opportunity to find out where the hell I was. Maybe even get an idea on how to get where I was trying to go.

This other trucker, in addition to referring to me as “son” — it’s been awhile since that’s happened — advised me that I should go down to the next exit and “flip a bitch.” I pretended like I knew what he was talking about and walked back to my truck. It only took a minute for me to realize that he was telling me to make a U-turn. That was the first time I came in contact with that particular colloquialism.

It did, however, make me think. Was he referring to it as a “bitch” because it was such a difficult thing to do? This was entirely possible. If you don’t drive a truck for a living, you would never know this, but having to turn around after missing an address is a major undertaking. There have been times where I’ve had to go ten miles in each direction just to find a safe place to do it. That, of course, is a bitch.

As I continued to drive, I then began to wonder if it the expression was derived from some kind of misogynistic source. You know, like the boorish or asinine version of “it’s a woman’s prerogative to change her mind.” It was interesting to ponder. Although, it is sexist if that is the case.

I am a man and I change my mind quite often. Take the other day for example. I was convinced that I was still in love with my ex-girlfriend. It was a lovely thought. Could you imagine? The answer to my great search for love was right there in front of me. It would be so easy and so convenient.

The problem with that has been revealed to me as I pound away at the fifth chapter of my upcoming book. When, as writers, we are faced with the difficult task of having to relive periods of our life for the purpose of relaying important ideas to others, it becomes impossible to fool ourselves for very long. It has the same effect as the Facebook memories function — but to the 10th power.

And so, while on Wednesday I may have believed that I was still madly in love, today I realize that I just have Platonic feelings for her. Profound and loving, but Platonic. You might say I flipped a bitch.

On feet of clay, 

and with half of a brain,

Too many songs in my head,

I’m on my way to you,

I’m sure of what I ought to do,

And I know what to say,

It all began in Berlin

Those dark empty streets,

Two restless souls would meet,

And at the journeys end,

They would both pretend,

What was and never been,

The sad thing about time.,

It never heals any pain

Does not erase the stain

Left that night in Berlin,

Though I tried ever since,

To get you of my mind,

I saw the number ride it on,

Take it on to you,

And when I long to raid it on 

If I want me to, 

But I remember your face,

You never told me your name

You said that’s part of the game 

So I played along

And by that siren song 

You trapped me in your maze,

So with a half loaf of bread,

And nothing else to my name,

I’m getting off a train,

In the biting wind,

A sinner carrying his sin,

On feet of clay, rather lay

Thank you for the compliments…. Although, it seems like you may need to get laid soon… or you might explode or implode into a manhole, from the pure and raw sexual tension in the air, perhaps could cause a sudden reversal of the earths gravitational pull, inevitably creating a black hole in the middle of your kitchen, that might suddenly start sucking random objects and kitchen utensils into its vast core, in an infinite cosmic pursuit of matter for it to digest, and with a shiny new tool! the scientists have spoken! For it shall be a BOY, and he shall THRUST FORTH A PROJECTILE, yes and the vigorous and flourishing pool of phlegm from THOUSAND ELDERLY GENTLEMEN… Politely ask any perky young female if they can deposit the gleaming, glittering toaster-crud into the wastebasket in the corner, WHERE IT BELONGS! Gently remind the perky young female that it’s an obvious and self-explanatory fact that everybody knows but her, and add that you are not DIRECTLY calling her stupid and that it’s OKAY to be a little slow.. So I say to you, my gentle sir, wouldn’t you agree, that perhaps a spontaneously combustible garden gnome might be of good taste? it also maaaaay be an epic eternal puzzle piece, like a motivation-pill you can pop and you can drop, drop that hit, add a pumping elektro-bass, a trendy, phat beat, and some killer gangsta’ lyrics you found on youtube…I think you got yourself a nifty bag of gas, and FYI, a hot-air balloon is much more fuel efficient than riding that horse you refuse to let go of…. not to mention it’s very socially acceptable so you will fit right in with the herd of blind followers, without the hassle of peer pressure making you do risky business with those shady social workers again! So try to be kind to all the Engineers out there, that are socially inept and incapable of harvesting their own black nuts…. Just good advice, take care, yours truly, Anna

oh and hey i have my face and brain installed into the cloud they call the nine, cuz this day was truly fine, she really made me shine, again, when she went all hey, now you’re mine and this must be some kind of sign, that the planets are alligned, yes on this hot summer day in may

Wouldn’t you say this all came into play, on this hot summer day in may

♩♪♫🎵🎼♫♬🎶♮♭♯🎹

I am anna! yay~